


All That I Need From You

by orphan_account



Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: First Kiss, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, London Show, M/M, Trench Era, mentions of poly relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-14
Updated: 2018-09-14
Packaged: 2019-07-12 01:43:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,332
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15984932
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: It's their first show back since the hiatus, but to Tyler, it means something more.





	All That I Need From You

**Author's Note:**

  * For [flightlessnerds](https://archiveofourown.org/users/flightlessnerds/gifts).



> Dedicated to Ella because she won a bet. But also, I love her and she's my unofficial adopted older sister who I will cherish forever. Thank you for always being there for me when I need it most <3

 “Hey, man, you mind if we talk?” Tyler asked, sitting down on the sofa in the green room. Time was ticking down before they would have to go outside and play to a crowd of English people, their first crowd, since returning from hiatus. Josh, by the door, retreated back into the room and dropped down next to his bandmate and best friend.

“Yeah, what’s up?” He pulled the beanie off his head and ran a hand through over his buzzed scalp. Tyler knew Josh felt self-conscious about his hair being so short and often wore hats to keep it concealed. Personally, he didn’t think it looked that bad, but knew if he said anything, it would probably only further put Josh on edge. Josh would do anything to please anybody. That’s just how he was.

“It’s just, I’ve really...” Tyler paused, trying to carefully piece his words together to form a sentence Josh would understand. “Jenna and I, we had a conversation a few days ago.”

“Kay,” Josh nodded, beckoning him to continue. Tyler bit his tongue and took a deep breath through his nose.

“When I did that interview with Zane,” Tyler continued to chew on the inside of his cheeks, “I talked about Jenna being like, uh, you know. My boat. And she’s just pulling me along.”

“Right, I watched the interview,” Josh rubbed at the back of his neck, his cheeks turning strawberry red as he added, “several times.”

Tyler hid a smile and spoke into his lap. “The thing is, you, also... are like, something keeping me afloat. You’re like, my life jacket, or something. Keeping me from drowning. Like, if I’m on stage, and I start panicking, start thinking about how I shouldn’t be up there, but then I look over at you smiling, putting your heart into those drums, and I feel so much better. I know for a fact I couldn’t do this without you.”

“That happens to me too, man. If I’m your life jacket, then you’re my bouy.”

He chuckled as he reached out to pat Josh’s knee. Josh laid his hand on top, as a nonverbal way to let Tyler know he was there.

“When I think about the future, the next cycle in life, where Jenna and I settle down and have kids, I don’t want you out of my life. I need you in my future. I need you just as much as I need Jenna.”

“You don’t think you’ll get rid of me that easily, do you?”

“No! No, that’s not what I meant,” Tyler attempted to retrace his steps even though he knew Josh was just messing with him. “I just meant like, when we’re retired and old and stuff. Even if I have kids, I’m still gonna be doing this music thing, y’know? It’s a part of me. I have to create. I just know I’ll be doing a lot less touring so I can be with Jenna and the kids. My kids.” He paused, thinking about the phrase that just left his lips. He really could not wait to have children. The idea of being a father sent chills down his spine and made him hopeful for the future. “I still want you in my life.”

“I’ll still be in your life,” Josh promised. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Tyler glanced at the cracked door and swallowed nervously. They were playing their first show since the hiatus today, in London of all places. He wasn’t sure if he felt ready. “The thing is, J, I...” He licked his lips, “I feel like there’s more I need of you than what we currently have.”

“Okay.” Tyler could see the confusion in his eyes, but Josh, being Josh, only urged him forward with his quiet, kind eyes.

“We’ve been doing this band thing for a pretty long time and we’ve always been really close. And just because I married Jenna, I didn’t want you to feel like I was abandoning you.”

“I never felt that way, Tyler.” Josh smiled. “I didn’t realize this had been bothering you so much.”

“It’s not that it’s been bothering me as much as I’ve been afraid to get it off my chest and into the open air. Because I... I’m not the best with words.” Josh rolled his eyes and opened his mouth to retort, but Tyler cut across him. “No, don’t argue. There’s a difference between me writing songs, me speaking in interviews, and us... having a conversation. I’m trying to pick my words carefully, but in the end, there’s always a chance I could end up hurting you, and I don’t want that. I would _never_ want to hurt you.”

Josh, his eyes wide, nodded. “You won’t hurt me. I promise. Whatever you have to say, I can handle it, alright?”

“I just... I don’t know if I can handle it is all, Josh. It’s like, we, as friends, always tell each other how much we love each other, how much we enjoy each other’s presence. But there’s a difference between me saying ‘I love you’ to Jenna and saying it to you, right?”

“Sure. Difference between being in love and having love to give.”

“Exactly. And we’re always led to believe that we can only fall in love with one person, but what if that’s not true? What if I fell in love with two people who each make me feel safe in their own special ways? Does that make me a freak?”

“Are we talking about platonic love?”

“No. I mean, in love, in love. Like, I need both people in my life to keep functioning. I want to be able to hug, to kiss, to have conversations with both these people and have it be... normal.”

Josh pondered this information for a couple long seconds, his hands bunching together in his lap. He was wearing camouflage pants with a yellow bandana tied around his calf; Bandito wear for their first Trench performance. He looked good, looked handsome, as always. Tyler would tell him that of course, but there was this pit in his stomach that made him wonder if Josh would begin to take it the wrong way after Tyler revealed his secret.

“So... we’re talking about a poly relationship, of sorts. In this... hypothetical situation.”

Tyler cleared his throat and sat up straighter. “Right, yes. Hypothetical.”

“I guess, if all three adults consent and are okay with it, then what’s the big deal? Especially if the you in this situation truly believes you can’t function without both people in your life romantically. If the other two feel the same way, and you all share the same amount of love, I think it’s okay.”

Tyler chuckled a bit as a wave of relief fell over him. He was halfway there and Josh hadn’t freaked out. This was good. This was a start. “Yeah, okay. Yeah. That makes sense.”

“If you don’t mind me asking, in this... hypothetical situation, it would be you and Jenna, but... who’s the third person?”

Their eyes met, but before Tyler could reply, Mark’s head popped inside the room, drawing both their attention away.

“It’s showtime, guys. You ready?”

Josh cracked his knuckles as he hopped off the couch. “As I’ll ever be.”

Tyler thanked God for coincidences and followed his bandmate out the door.

* * *

They felt _alive._

There was no other way to describe it. The return of the screams, the cheers, the atmosphere of people who loved them and supported them wanting more—Tyler was breathing in sweat-soaked air and trying his hardest not to start weeping, especially with Josh’s arm around his shoulders, their bodies stained with yellow confetti.

Josh was especially coated, as he was shirtless, and kept trying to brush it off his chest. The smile on his face was bigger than any smile Tyler swore he had ever seen. Josh felt just like he did. This was only the beginning, and they were unstoppable.

With cheers still blaring in their eyes and the taste of salt on their lips, they headed back to the green room to shower and change. Tyler pulled his oversized shirt off and tossed it onto the couch, running a hand down his chest to rub away some of the sweat. He knew it was gross, but Josh wouldn’t care. He was still trying to get sticking confetti off his chest and shoulders.

“That was--” Tyler started, getting interrupted.

“Great?” Josh grinned. “It was. It was... it was amazing.”

“And that’s why I could never give this up,” Tyler’s smile was just as big as his bandmates’. He rubbed his ears until they were red and reached down to unknot his boots.

“Could you get the confetti off my back? I can’t really reach.”

Tyler stopped to look up at Josh, his front pressed against the door, as he lamely tried to wipe away confetti. With one shoe untied, Tyler stomped off and began to pick and peel the sweat-covered paper. It was wet, falling apart in Tyler’s hands, and he groaned obnoxiously.

“This is so gross, dude.”

“I’m sorry, just trying to give the fans what they want.”

“What, you shirtless?” Tyler snorted. Josh reached a hand back to give him a love tap.

“Duh. It’s definitely _not_ because I’m dying of heat. Especially because we had to be extra and light a car on fire.”

“Not extra,” Tyler corrected, “theatrical.”

“Right, my bad.” A pause. “You never did answer my question before the show.”

“Of course I want Mexican for dinner.”

“Not that one.” Josh turned around so his back thudded against the door and looked Tyler in the eyes. They stood so close that their chests, still soaked in sticky sweat, almost touched. “The one about the third person.”

Tyler cleared his throat and reached to pull the beanie off Josh’s head. “Aren’t you sweating?”

“Are you deliberately changing the subject?”

He bunched the beanie in his hands. “No. I’m... I’m just thinking.”

“Because if the adults in this situation are all okay with it, then what’s stopping it from happening?”

“Fear,” Tyler blurted out, dropping the beanie to the floor. He stepped closer so their chests were touching. Playing shows always got the both of them in such a high that they were sporting boners and hard nipples by the end. That’s why Tyler kept his shirt on, but Josh really didn’t seem to mind having his nips flying about. “Rejection.”

“Enough that it’s lasted almost ten years?” Josh bit his lip and Tyler felt a flutter in his chest.

“I just, I didn’t want things to... change, uh, between this third person and I.”

“All you have to do is specify that the ‘I love you’ has changed from platonic to romantic.”

“That’s a lot harder to do than it looks.”

Josh raised an eyebrow. “But what if the third person feels the same way? You’ll never know if you don’t ever do anything.”

“Yeah, well, maybe that’s what I’ve been trying to work up the courage to do.”

“And it probably doesn’t help that you and the third person have pretty submissive personalities.” A smile rose to his lips, but it was different than the one from the adrenaline of the show. It was mischievously and had a tint of arousal to it.

Tyler tilted his head. “No, that probably doesn’t help.”

“So... if this third person reached out first, would that make you feel better?”

“I think so.”

“And Jenna is okay with it?”

“Definitely. She loves this third person almost just as much as I do.”

“Yeah,” Josh concluded, his hands moving to Tyler’s waist. Tyler had his pants so low on his hips that Josh was able to circle his thumbs at the exposed skin.

Tyler was pretty sure his entire face was strawberry red, but he leaned in as Josh did, meeting his lips halfway. Almost immediately, they were overcome with a cloud of ecstasy, lost in the fading years that this could have happened and didn’t. To be fair, it was something both men had thought about doing for a very long time, but just like Tyler said, the fear of rejection always coated the back of their brains and made it impossible to stand up to say something. In the haze of the show, they felt stronger, courageous, to embrace the love they shared, to cut the ribbon that blocked them from becoming more than friends.

Tyler moved his hands to the nape of Josh’s neck, sliding them over the soft surface of his buzzed hair and pressed harder against his body, causing the door to rattle. Josh lifted his hips a little, grinding his tented crotch over Tyler’s own and giggling at the shivers that followed. Tyler didn’t mind how silly all of this was, because something he fantasized about for years and years on end was finally happening.

The sweat ended up being a good thing, making it easier to glide over one another and caress parts of the body that would usually be quite dry. Josh sucked hickeys into Tyler’s neck, making it Tyler’s turn to burst out in giggles. They were happy, more happy than they had been playing a show together in God knows how long.

Out of breath, they decided to pull away and spent a good minute staring into each other’s eyes. Josh’s eye bore the entire galaxy, fitted with stars and planets and everything Tyler wanted to call home. After being married to Jenna for three years, after spending days worrying about why he didn’t feel complete, finally, it all made sense.

“I love you,” He said, the words foreign even though he had told Josh that a million times. But Josh understood. They both did.

“I love you too,” Josh huffed, his eyes crinkling at the corners. He pulled Tyler in for another kiss, ignoring Mark’s reminder about leaving for the hotel, and allowed himself to fall in love all over again.


End file.
